Sylvana Chapter 13: Bargaining

Filed: Sylvana @ 5:44am on August 26, 2010 No comments yet! :(   Word Count: 669
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This entry is part 13 of 16 in the series Sylvana

Sylvana

“If I gave you 10,000$, would you leave me alone John ?”, Sylvana offered.

“Even if you gave me a million dollars I wouldn’t. It’s useless. It’s not money I want. It’s to get you out of your shell. Perhaps are you too used to being able to buy people off or get anyone you want that’s you’ve lost track of what it is to be human”.

“Then, just give me a few more months John. Let me get over my pain. Once I am done, I’ll call you.”

Sylvana was almost shaking. She opened something up. Which pain was she talking about ? I wanted to ask her but I saw how her body language indicated she was closed off.

“Whatever is affecting you Sylvana, you don’t need emotionless encounters with strangers. You need someone close to help you get through it. You need someone to love you and help you. I can be that someone.”

Instead of opening up, she closed off a little more.

“I am not ready. Just give me more time, please… once I will be better, I’ll get back to you. I promise”

Something was clearly affecting her, but I couldn’t get past her defences.

“Time cannot fix anything Sylvana. You need to fix your problems before they overtake you and judging by the way you look now, I would say that it’s already the case.”

“What do you think I should do then ? I saw plenty of psychologists. Not a single one was able to help me.”

“If you were as distant with them then you were with your lovers, I can’t really blame them.”

“Then that’s what I’ll do. I do see another one and open up more.”. She stood up and thanked me but I felt this was yet another excuse to buy more time.

“You don’t really plan to do so right ? It’s another one of your excuses, isn’t it ?”

“What do you want from me exactly ! I have no idea what you want me to do !”, she began sobbing and tears where running down her cheeks.

“Perhaps tell me what is bothering you ? Tell me why you are this way ?”

“It’s none of your business. You are just as worst as them. I don’t want you to be here. Go away.”. She had curled up in a corner of the room, crying almost silently and closing up on herself.

I sat next to her, leaving Linda alone near the bed.

I put my arm around her shoulder and soon enough, she was pressing her naked body against mine.

After a few minutes, Sylvana opened her heart for most likely the first time of her life.

“My parents were really rich. They founded a real property investment firm who owns several office building in town. When I was 12, I was kidnapped by three men for a ransom and my parents paid the ransom. But they didn’t let me go. They kept me as their sexual object for other four years. My only way to survive was to retreat inside my shell. The man kept asking for more money over the years until my father died of a heart attack caused by the stress of my disappearance.

When I was finally released at 16, I was totally traumatized. My only sexual experiences had been by the various times I had been raped and my brain couldn’t process that many times I had find some sexual pleasure from it.

I was told it was a form of Stockholm syndrome, but it didn’t help me overcome my problems. My own mother eventually committed suicide and I was left alone with my pain. Only the police officer who found me showed any signs of liking me but he was old and died shortly after. Since then, I’ve tried to learn what it was to have pleasure voluntarily but I still don’t know how to trust people.”

By the time each speech finished, Linda had joined us in our little corner and was cuddling with Sylvana, stroking her hair. There wasn’t a single dry eye in the room.

Series Navigation«Sylvana Chapter 12: AngerSylvana Chapter 14: Depression»

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